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The Cambridges ‘are on increasingly shaky ground’ on the global stage

I got tagged on this story on Twitter and I was truly laughing my ass off. Australian columnist Daniela Elser wrote a piece for an Aussie outlet about the comparison between the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge’s Easter church walk versus the Sussex show at the Hague over the weekend. Elser is definitely more of a Cambridge-stan, a Keen defender, if you will. Perhaps we should read this as the normally Cambridge-sympathetic media starting to get seriously worried about the Cambridges and how dull they are, and how incapable they are of competing with Prince Harry and Meghan on the global stage. The piece is called “Hidden disaster for royals in stunning picture of Meghan Markle,” and you should definitely read these excerpts in the key of “breathless, blind panic.”

The Cambridges’ church walk: “If ever there was an image of sublime royal perfection, this was it. Sunshine! Happy families! Photogenic kidlets! It’s the sort of photograph that should have picture editors the length and breadth of Fleet Street excitedly barking into phones to yell about front pages and the sort of photograph that should have the Queen’s most senior courtiers breathing a long sigh of relief into their afternoon Horlicks. The reality? There was only one royal show anyone was interested in this weekend and it was taking place only a ferry ride away in the Netherlands, starring none other than our aforementioned small screen star, Meghan, Duchess of Sussex.

Alarm bells: “If there is any sort of alarm bell inside Buckingham Palace or Windsor Castle, maybe some sort of handpainted porcelain number they nicked from their Hanoverian relatives and which is usually reserved for summoning a footman, then today is the day to start ringing it with urgency. Because what we have just witnessed is the shape of things to come and the news for the house of Windsor is all bad.

The Sussexes on the global stage: “What has just played out in The Hague this weekend has been our first real taste of what life post-Megxit is really going to look like and the picture is a dire one for the Queen, staunch monarchists and the Kensington Palace communications staff. Thanks to these clashing events, the Easter Sunday service and the Invictus Games, for the very first time we have truly seen the couples against one another by circumstance – and William and Kate have been totally and utterly blown out of the water by the made-for-TV Sussex show.”

Worst fears: “What we have just seen are the palace’s worst fears about Harry and Meghan come to fruition in high-definition close-up: That the Sussexes would completely and utterly monopolise the world’s attention and interest and nothing short of Kate rocking up to St George’s Chapel in an on-trend see-through dress baring One’s Knickers could come close to toppling the Sussexes’ dominance.

The currency of the monarchy: “Let’s get one thing straight here: We are not talking about some cheap popularity contest that the pinstriped palace staff can stiffly dismiss as beneath them. Public attention is the commodity which powers the monarchy. Buckingham Palace needs Brits and those of us scattered about the Commonwealth to pay attention to what the HRHs are up to so as to maintain support for the institution. To ensure survival, the palace has to be seen as relevant and a force for good in contemporary society, a message they can only get out there if we, the public, are paying attention. Because if a climate change project is announced in the woods and no one is watching, does it really make a sound?

Shaky ground: “William and Kate are on increasingly shaky ground here and I’m not sure they entirely know how to play this game. Right now, the Windsors look like they are at sea about how to compete in this new royal arms race. What seems increasingly clear is that the Cambridges’ program of (genuinely interesting and innovative) good works cannot compete when Harry and Meghan put on the razzle dazzle and dial it all up to 11. Two innately charismatic people, freed of any palace strictures and with the budgetary oomph of Netflix behind them, are always going to prove far more compulsively watchable than two well-meaning, hardworking sorts competently getting on with things.

[From News.com.au]

LMAO. This is one of the funniest things I’ve ever read. It reminds me of the panic from the Kate-stans the very second Harry and Meghan’s engagement was announced. It’s been like this from the very start and don’t let anyone tell you different. But now, with travel completely opened up and the Sussexes’ two years of brand-building coming to fruition, the Cambridges are going to be in for some very hard times. Think also of the timing of the Invictus Games coming a month after the Cambridges’ Flop Tour as well – that was William and Kate on the global stage, doing colonialist cosplay and earning scorn from the international media. Crash-cut to Invictus, with Meghan and Harry showing off their empathy, heart, service, warmth and intelligence. God, I could eat this with a spoon.

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Backgrid.

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